Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Tis the Season...

To be jolly? You know what makes me jolly? Liquor. You know what else? Being done with teaching for a while. And planning a January jaunt to Thailand. And alliteration. You know what makes me un-jolly? A few things. Here they are, in no particular order:
  • Being one metric fuck of a long way from home on Christmas
  • Still having the traces of this Asian devil-sickness that I got 2+ weeks ago
  • The weather being colder than a welldigger's ass
  • Realizing that flights to Thailand are expensive as hell
  • Not talking to Shan
  • The ubiquitous brown (or maybe it's "Brown," with a capital?) sauce they put on things here. Not everything, and it's not truly ubiquitous, but it's been on several things I've eaten recently and I could certainly do without it.
  • Missing my family... and my dog. :(
Ok, enough doom and gloom. I'd hate to lead any of you to think that I'm even a little bit unhappy here, because I'm really not. I think I'm just moving out of the honeymoon phase and into the "This is reality, and I have to shop and do laundry and work everyday" phase, and I'm feeling a bit disillusioned. I'll get over it soon, I promise. Oh, and in case you were curious, 1 metric fuck is roughly equivalent to half the circumference of the earth. They like the metric system over here, so I've adapted it to my own personal use. See also: 1 metric assload, 1 metric crock of shit, etc...

So, to counter, here are jollifying things in my life, again in no particular order:
  • Going on a ski trip soon! I can't wait... even though the last time I went skiing I almost died. We can thank Mike Bridwell for that one -- trick skis, my ass. Those things are death rockets.
  • Facebook -- old friends just pourin out of the woodwork! I love hearing from people I haven't seen or spoken to since college, or hell! in some cases, high school.
  • This girl I'm tutoring. Her name is Min Kyeong, and she's just awesome. She's only in middle school, but her English is amazing! Like, better than some of the ESL students I had in college composition courses at UH. On the other hand, she did drop the "F" bomb on me while we were reading last night. I think my jaw hit the floor, and then I just laughed and laughed while she sat there blushing. Yep. I heard a 13-year-old Korean kid say "What the fuck?" Wha's up now?
  • Charlie Brown Christmas special. I showed this to several of my classes, and I love it. Notice I used the word "I" there. They didn't get it at all, really... but I had a grand ole time. And some of the lines in there, I remembered, but had no idea they were from this movie! Lucy's priceless on her Xmas wish list: "I just want what I have coming to me. I just want my fair share." Love it.
  • Couchsurfing. I mean, I realize accomodations in Thailand probably run like 6 seashells a night or something, but still, this thing is priceless! If you don't know what I'm talking about, go to couchsurfing.com and take a look around. Not only do you get to sleep for free in someone's house, but you usually get a local tour guide at the same time! It's just an awesome project... I stayed in Amsterdam for 8 days earlier this year, and didn't spend a dime on lodgings. Well, that's not entirely true. We did buy him some wine, bread and cheese, not to mention a scrumptious Chinese meal one night, but that was nothing in comparison to what we got. Just check it out. One caveat: you should probably be willing to return the favor and let people crash on your couch as well... it's only fair. :)
  • Seth Rogen. I love this man. Superbad, Pineapple Express, Knocked Up, 40 Year Old Virgin... he's just a comedic genius. So let's all give a big hearty thank you to that tubby hairy Jew.
  • Chocolate chip cookies. You got a problem with that?
  • New friends... especially Bo Il (my co-teacher), Jill and Laura -- 2 girls in Icheon who are the bees' knees, funny and very helpful with classroom-y teach-y stuff.
  • Old friends... I know I already said this and all, but it's really nice to hear from everyone back home, and know that you're all pining away for me, neglecting your health and crying yourselves to sleep at night. Please know that your devotion isn't going unnoticed. :)
  • Losing weight. Yep, I'm feelin and lookin pretty good, if I do say so myself. And I do... Although this brings me to...
  • French fries. I had my first honest-to-god french fries since I've been in Korea tonight. And ya know, I wasn't that impressed. I think they needed salt. But anyway, there's something excessively and perversely comforting about eating french fries... I mean, they've even got my name in them. I don't know. I'm weird.
  • Da Bears! Still alive in the playoff hunt, believe it or not! Wish I could've seen that GB game, but even the ESPN gamecast had me doing little fisty-pumps at my desk and frightening the poor Korean women I work with. I'm not sure I could handle a full-on actual visual represenation of the game. I've evolved. I only need subtle verbal clues to picture the game in amazing 3D life-like mental projections on my inner ... um, wall? what do they show projections on? ... Screens. Yeah. I've evolved, alright. Bite me.
OK. That's my story and I'm stickin to it. I'll try to write a 5-paragraph essay on "What Christmas Means to Me" and have it up in a couple of days. =Þ


emily said...

You're awesome. And I miss you. And couchsurfing is THE BEST; the people you meet are amazing.
Merry Christmas. :D

Sean said...

Aww... now I'm blushing! I miss you too, doll! Yeah -- I'm definitely couchsurfing in Thailand! I've already got one guy lined up on Phuket Island (and that name... I mean, I know it's pronounced Pu-get... but it never ceases to crack me up when I see it), and I've got requests in with a couple more in different places -- one's a Swedish SCUBA instructor living on this tiny little island... so small, in fact, that it doesn't have any cars on it! I'm excited about that one! Happy Christmas!